decisions, decisions...


First off, apologies for not having a weekend DIY for you. I have been having a really rough past few months. Perhaps it partly has to do with these gloomy days as we transition into Spring, but I have been feeling very stressed and sometimes even depressed at times. You may or may not know this, but I technically have a total of 5 jobs

              My “jobs”…
       1. a blogger
            2. an etsian
        3. a graphic designer for Miami’s dining services
           4. a freelance graphic designer for Miami’s bookstore and Apple services
       5. a fashion photographer for Up Magazine
         6. if you count being a full time design student [which certainly feels like a job]

************UPDATE************
The lovely CB from Citybirds Nest made me realize today that number one up there shouldn't actually be on that list. Blogging is not a job for me. In fact, it's one of the only releases I have from a stressful day at times. I love blogging and would never give it up :]
*******************************

I’ve learned over the years that I am a very empathetic person and a lot of times driven by guilt [perhaps the wrong word?] The point is I worry so much about others at times that I forget to think about my own needs. I started out with one job in college. It was so easy then. But when a better opportunity came around I couldn’t let my current job and managers down so I decided to make both jobs work. Here I am, three years down the road juggling 5 jobs while trying to graduate. I’m beginning to realize that two out of those 6 jobs up there are not something I’m in because I love it, but because I feel obligated to do it. And no, being a blogger and managing an Etsy shop are not one of the two :]

It's come to the point where I need to let some things go. I think I might be some what of a workaholic. Not in the sense that I like to work all the time, but in the fact that I want to do everything. I've wanted to be a bartender since I was 16. And now that I'm nearing my birthday, that can actually become a reality. But this summer is beginning to look a little too crammed. I've accepted an internship with a non-profit graphic design firm and will be commuting from Oxford to Dayton a few times a month while I work at my current job. And on top of all that I've been offered this awesome freelance job for a design firm in Dayton as well. I really don't think I can do bartending as well and that is one dream I don't think I can give up.

Luckily, I won't be dealing with two of the jobs over the summer. I've told the bookstore that I have too much going on with internships, jobs, and a summer class to work for them as well. [yes, I'm also taking a sprint course over the summer. geesh] The photography gig is only during the school year so that won't be a problem either. But I'm realizing I have stretched myself too thin and I can't do everything as much as I'd like to. So it's time to sit down and make some decisions. Sigh.

8 comments

  1. Good luck! Sometimes the decision making process is harder than living with the decisions that you make. I will pray for you in hopes that you make the "right" decisions for you.
    And I'm so glad that blogging is not something you plan to give up. You've been a great indirect help to me in getting my blog up and running and successful.
    Will be thinking about you girly. Have an amazing birthday. Cut loose and put all this stuff aside for a few days. It will be there when you get "Back."

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  2. Hey! I just used the same print for a grateful monday post over on my own blog, and you know Elisa at a beautiful mess just posted about how she, as a self-proclaimed workaholic, balances everything.

    The thing that worked best for me was to relax (I took the dog for a long walk came back and made a cup of tea) and then make a list of the things in my life that were important to me and then a list of things I wanted to accomplish both professionally and personally on the long and short term. It became really clear what projects, activities etc had to stay and which had to go! It wasn't easy, but because I knew I was coming from a relaxed and peaceful place, I felt good about it and I've kept my lists as reminders for when new opportunities come along.

    I'm really enjoying reading your progress as an ambitious woman and am keeping my fingers crossed for you!

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  3. Allison,

    Give yourself some time to really think things over. You'll know what to do! You'll realize what feels right and what will be okay to let go of. The wonderful thing about being in university is you start to really know yourself and understand what truly matters in your life professionally and personally. How you want to engage with the world around you. Trust that you'll make the right decisions for you. And at the end of the day that is all that really matters, what is best for you.

    You've got such wonderful potential! It's great to read about all that you're doing!

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  4. wow lady you sound like me! i feel like i have so many jobs as well. it is hard to juggle at some times but yes you have to make the decisions on what is going to keep you happy and sane. yes,ou only live once but sometimes you need to stop and smell the roses once in a while. you are so talented you need time to recharge yourself! did you read elsie's workaholic post? really great as it was nice to know i am not the only one who works round the clock for something i love. you'll make the right decision as hard as it may be but it will be good. remember the blog shouldn't be a job it should be fun so keep that in mind. i hope you are able to take a break soon sweetie! you should come out to cali and take some time to chill out in the sun and ride your bike with me and the mister :D

    if you need to chat i am always here for you...you know where to reach me :) have a relaxing weekend sweetie and remember take sometime for yourself :)

    xo,
    cb

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  5. I love reading posts like this from you. it's so real and raw and difintely relatable. I feel just like you do. YSometimes we can only do so much and people pleasing is what we try to do. I learned the hard way to NEVER EVER factor anyone before me and my family. do what makes you happy :)

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  6. You're totally right! Blogging is not a job for me. I need to change that. I love blogging. It's me release from a stressful day :]
    And I am adamant about making it to Cali sometime soon and will have to bring my bike along for the ride for sure :] It will happen!!! Just gotta find the time haha story of my life right there

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  7. U need to live your life happy.. that above everything else.. and remember..u can't do it all.. do what makes u the most fullfilled and happy.. xo hugs

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  8. aww allison! i know exactly how you feel. sometimes i commit to too many things and then i feel like i'm letting everyone down if i am running behind. i kind of have a problem saying no sometimes.
    but yeah, i agree with cb (and you) that blogging is totally not a job and i love it! it is one of the most fun things that i do and it has allowed me to meet amazing people. like you! hooray.
    try to take some time to relax (hopefully the weekend helped!) and let's skype chat soon. whenever you have time ;)

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Thanks for stopping by! I'd love to know what you think!
-Allison